Is your marriage in crisis? Would you recognise it if it was? Do you know the warning signs? A marriage in crisis may occasionally camouflage itself as a natural but somewhat boring marriage until it is too late to change it and save it.
You have to pay attention to all the signs of health in your marriage to make certain your relationship is proceeding strongly. Foremost, consider how frequently you have sex. Whilst sex Is not the entire point of the marriage—it is a great deal more important than just that—it is a important part of a healthy marriage.
A marriage in crisis is generally pretty easy to spot by considering your sex lives. Do you have sex infrequently? Is it a big, scheduled deal when you do have sex? Have you stopped having sex spontaneously just when you feel like it?
If sex becomes a scheduled activity, a marriage could certainly recover. In truth, most marriages go through a phase very much like that when a baby is born. Each child makes it increasingly difficult to find the time to spend with our partner over a meal or before leaving for work, let alone finding a spare hour to make love.
However a marriage in crisis never breaks out of that pattern. Rather, even once the time is available the partners do not experience spontaneous sex. Generally there is very little physical affection shown throughout the day either. People in love and content to be together tend to hug and kiss at different times through the day.
An affectionate couple will frequently touch one another just in passing. One may give the other a fast kiss on the cheek or forehead for no reason. Does this still happen in your marriage? Do you ever sneak a quick pinch or pat on the bottom or a sexy look in the middle of the day?
Once these things start to disappear, it may be a sign that the marriage is in trouble. The other thing that goes in a very obvious way is common courtesy. When you say “thank you,” “excuse me,” and “please,” throughout your day to strangers more than you say them to your partner, something’s amiss.
We take our partners for granted in this way, and eventually this leads to a sort of coldness between people. There is simply no reason not to be affectionate and thank our partners (and say please) during the course of everyday life.
The good news is that whenever you are encountering these warning signs, you can start working immediately to correct them. And you do not have to make a fanfare about it or announce the change. Merely change what you do.
Make a point of giving affection and unexpected kisses. Be very polite again, and say please and thank you, even when it is just the two of you. Make time for making love. Do these things and your marriage in crisis could soon be back on track and you could be happier than ever.